Death. It’s all around us. We read about it in the news, we see it on the news, we hear about it from our friends but yet we seem unaffected by it. We carry on with our lives with just a thought that yes something bad has happened to someone somewhere, but that’s all it is- a brief thought. All we may feel at most is empathy.
Until that monster raises his ugly head to strike where it hurts and then when we are exposed to the sheer brutality of death it HITS our very core! And moving on seems impossible. But nature has its way and coping with death is one of the things that we are gifted with beforehand. Nobody teaches us to deal with it, it just happens.
Hear those empty consolations from your well wishers as you whisper a polite thank you and they say time heals, it will get better, translation- you will get used to it in time. No you may never forget but everytime you remember it will hurt less.
It’s not yet been a month since my pup passed away. The first week was the worst. The grief came every other hour and with it waves of pain with uncontrollable tears. Then it got better. After avoiding the places he used to tread I finally came to terms with facing it all and I walked his paths and remembered him and no tears were shed.
And I thought this is it, I’m finally able to remember him and not break down every time I do. But in the last week as I went to his room in the middle of the night it all came back. The tears, the grief the sadness it all overpowered me again and that’s when I realised, I may never be completely over it. The pain may reduce but in some corner the pain of those last few days will always remain. I try to think of our happy times together but somehow it’s the last days and his pain that keeps overpowering the happy thoughts.
In this age of tech I resorted to what any other millennial would do, thank God for google. Though there are others out there it doesn’t help. With everything I read (the first site being mydogjustdied.com)I just wondered why I had to be in this situation, why couldn’t he have survived, why did he even get sick, why was our time so short?
None of my questions remain answered, I just hope and pray he is happy chasing birds and biting pipes and dragging branches and biting shoes wherever he is. HAPPY.. Atleast that would make one of us…
D's Corner 